Life skills

Worry is also imagination but misplaced

Worry becomes a habit if it gets hold on us. Habit of worry negates us to cut short the size of problem and we usually start worrying about small things out of their proportion without clear distinction between factual and imaginary.A chronic worrier is continually being upset by a series of fears and anxieties which make him likely to get into confusion in real crisis. worry consists of thinking about what may happen and the possible results most of the times in negative version. Courage and common sense are the factors which help us control worry and reduce it to a minimum. To win over worry is like winning half the battle.A practical person looks at it fairly without exaggerating its importance. Many of the things we fear and worry about do not happen. Even when they do, it is surprising how much help we receive from unexpected sources to solve the worry. Having taken reasonable precautions, do not worry about the future. We sometimes worry when it is not really our worry. It happens when we understand others more than they understand themselves. We should analyze the situation and does not let every small issue to disturb our mind and destroy our thoughtful intelligence.One should broaden his view and look out for avenues to deal the issue rather than pondering longer upon the reason. Therefore stop worrying and start working.

I have learned…

I’ve learned-
that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.

I’ve learned-
that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back.

I’ve learned-
 that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I’ve learned-
that no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I’ve learned-
that it’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.

I’ve learned-
that you should never ruin an apology with an excuse.

I’ve learned-
that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something.

I’ve learned-
that you shouldn’t compare yourself to the best others can do.

I’ve learned-
that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I’ve learned-
that it’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I’ve learned-
that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I’ve learned-
that you can keep going long after you can’t.

I’ve learned-
that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I’ve learned-
that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I’ve learned-
that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I’ve learned-
that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I’ve learned-
 that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I’ve learned-
that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

Life

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there, to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to help you figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be – a roommate, a neighbor, a professor, a friend, a lover, or even a complete stranger – but when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment they will affect your life in some profound way. Sometimes things happen to you that may seem horrible, painful, and unfair at first, but in reflection you find that without overcoming those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, willpower, or heart. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness, and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, whatever they may be, life would be like a smoothly paved straight flat road to nowhere. It would be safe and comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.

The people you meet who affect your life, and the success and downfalls you experience, help to create who you are and who you become. Even the bad experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are sometimes the most important ones.

If someone loves you, give love back to them in whatever way you can, not only because they love you, but because in a way, they are teaching you to love and how to open your heart and eyes to things.

If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious to whom you open your heart.

Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take from those moments everything that you possibly can for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk to people that you have never talked to before, and listen to what they have to say.

Let yourself fall in love, break free, and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don’t believe in yourself, it will be hard for others to believe in you.

You can make anything you wish of your life. Create your own life and then go out and live it with absolutely no regrets.

And if you love someone tell them, for you never know what tomorrow may have in store.

Learn a lesson in life each day that you live!

Today is the tomorrow you were worried about yesterday.

Think About it? Was it worth it?

Suffer Vs Struggle

There is an opinion that good people always suffer and bad people some how are able to avoid the sufferings. Suffering is generally an individual's opinion.Suffering is an unpleasant experience. What is suffering to one person is not to another person. For the struggle to be meaningful, the knowledge of how to do a thing is necessary. Suppose a saint and a sinner are playing a chess game, it is obvious that the person who knows the game will win the game. But if we think that only saint should win the game and not the sinner, it doesn't carry the logical sense. It should be understood that the game has nothing to do with saintliness, it is also not correct to compare the saint and the sinner in this context. It is also same with the worldly affairs. If we don't know something we have to suffer irrespective of being good or bad by self. Generally the so called good people lack many things required for a successful living. hey happen to be impractical and that is why bad things happen to good people. Great men encounter problems but they are not scared. Their self confidence and boldness make them endure the ups and downs in life and hence they become great. It is said that " a foolish person encounters thousands of occasions of unhappiness and hundreds of occasions of fear every day, but not a wise man". No man is happy or unhappy through out the day. There are only happy moments and unhappy moments. So it can be concluded that let us think, " why do bad things happen to us? must be changed to " where can they lead us". Never say I am suffering but dare to say I am struggling.

Self Mastery

Most of us do not posses the secret of acquiring happiness nor have the power to retain it when happiness is with us. It invariably requires wisdom and endurance. May be that is why through the ages emphasis has been laid down on self-discipline and self-control. Self mastery is a far greater possession than the possession of earthly goods. Self control assumes greater importance in our day to day lives. For example, a person under the influence of hatred, uncontrolled emotion may do something that he/she may always regret. If asked why he/she did like that, reply would be that he/she could not help it out and it was done before it is known to the senses and in a flash of impulse. It would be wiser to pause a few moments before acting rather than to spend time afterwards, striving to undo what has been done in a moment of haste and madness. The same energy that pulsates through our hearts and mind, also operates our hands and feet, therefore learning to collect and control this inherent energy would mean great asset to our life. It is we who make it possible for such detrimental influences to rise in us also it is in our power to make it impossible. Self mastery is no lip service. Using high sounding words expressing moral ideas may not be mark of self mastery. If a person lacks in fundamental principle, patience, forbearance, he will burst out some day and his dogmas and theories will go for nothing. With out poise we cannot hope to find happiness. Happiness is a quality of mind, it is something we possess within. It is vital necessity in our lives if we wish to maintain social order and keep harmony and healthfulness in our lives. In Self mastery lies the secret of all strength and fulfillment. Self mastery demands proper direction and fortification of inherent energies. Mastery of self gives wisdom through which we depend on our inner strength  in all circumstances.

Some marvels of wisdom by Swami Vivekananda

•  A man who does not believe in himself is an atheist
• Belief is no part of religion. Religion is a state of superconsciousness.
• The ghosts of past thoughts, past lives hold us down
• As long as we need someone else to make us happy, we are slaves
• Book-worship is the worst form of idolatry
• Cowardice is no virtue
• It is culture that withstands shocks, not a simple mass of knowledge
• Individuality in universality is the plan of creation
• Out of purity and silence comes the word of power
• Human should not have only faith but should have intellectual faith
• There is something in us which is free and permanent

Circumstances

Its a habit of some people to blame the circumstances and external things for their failures in life. Such people should think that how others are able to succeed in similar circumstances. It shows that there must be something difference in the attitude in the individuals concerned. We should understand that one cannot alter external things to suit passing whims and wishes, one can set aside whims and wishes but alter attitude of mind towards externals. Its a fact that most of the times we cannot mould the actions of others towards us but we can rightly fashion our actions towards them.We may not be able to break the wall of circumstances but we can wisely adopt to find a way out into enlarged circumstances by extending our mental horizon.When a man regards his circumstances as spurs to his resources, when he sees that his so called draw-backs are the very steps which he is to mount successfully to his achievement, then necessity gives birth to intuition and hindrances are transformed into aids. 

Lower Nature Vs Higher Nature 

     We often  fail to perceive the preciousness of life. And when we actually perceive it we might have already lost the prime time of our life. Life skills are more important than any other skills including soft skills to lead a fruitful and peaceful life. A peaceful life demands relatively matured mindset and higher nature which raises every time it is suppressed. When ever we come across a problem in life, there invariably exist two options. One,we normally react with general nature and the other we act with higher nature. For example, when we come across a failure, it lingers in our mind for quite a good time and finally leaves an unpleasant scar in our heart. It has an easy access to our memory and appears instantly disturbing adversely. This thing happens with our general nature. When it is compared with the higher nature, the reaction is initially same but changes its course as time moves on. The immediate result of any failure is upset. This is common for even the strongest heart. But the higher nature recovers within short time and does not waste any more time or energy in worrying but rather start working with an intention to overcome the failure. Therefore, lets think in a different way and board on to the higher nature when ever we face a challenge. Lets learn life skills which form the basis of our comfortable existence on this planet.

Let how hard be the task, keep a tight upper lip   

 It is said that" a seed has to break up the strong earth to survive and grow". Its relevancy extends to our lives also. Things never come in conjunction to our requirements but we have to mould and align the opportunities to our credit. The course of our lives should be cleverly planned and executed. We have to break up certain obstacles and progress. Its imminent to mount the uphills to be at the top and we must dive below the deep waters if wish for pearls. When a person encounters a problem, he immediately chooses the easy way to escape rather than standing against it. Always remember that" the best way to get out of a problem is to go through it". Just travel into the problem with confidence. The best example can be when we are walking in the dark, initially every thing seems to be   uncertain and the path for destination is invisible. But as we proceed in the dark, things seem better and way is more clear than before. So friends, get on to work and rake off the so called obstacles of illusion to live up the expectations of self.

Happiness as a habit

    A happy person was asked how he was able to be happy  in all circumstances irrespective of all types of disturbances in life. He replied "Its very simple, when I wake up in the morning I have only two options, either to be happy or to be unhappy and I always choose to be happy". It seems a casual answer but if pondered in depth it suggests greatest message of our life. It is said that we should not let yesterday use up too much of our today. What was yesterday is just a recent past that is already encrypted in the annals of history. Only thing that can be done is to learn lessons or take a meaningful message and let it to be buried in the past. A general notion exists that one should sustain and exhibit minimum tension in order to push the things. But its quite possible that one can accomplish all his tasks and still remain peaceful and relaxed. We should understand the difference between being "Mindful and responsible" and   "remain tensed". Remember, great achievers never feared small hurdles but made these obstacles to be stepping stones and not stopping stones. To be happy and trying to be happy are the two shores. So friends, make unconditional happiness to be a habit of life.